Topic

Silly GOD pleas

Dear GOD,

As your faithful servant, I would like the power to smite the unbelievers...

And the believers too, thinking about it

Clayr

Posted 2 years ago by Clayr Subscriber! | Permalink

Replies

  • Dear GOD,

    I just ask for the banjos to stop in my house. I want to enjoy the trees without the incessant strumming.

    Please make it stop.

    1M₡  | Xial
    Posted 2 years ago by Xial Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Der God

    God plz

    -Dolan
    Posted 2 years ago by Cirnots Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Mute the music,  100000000? :) 
    Posted 2 years ago by NutMeg Botwin Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Are you there, GOD? It's me, Margaret...
    Posted 2 years ago by Dahlia DreadNaught Subscriber! | Permalink
  • You all are wasting your time. I know a couple of Glitches, Vladimir and Estragon, who have been waiting for God--or was it Godot?--for a LONG time now.
    Posted 2 years ago by Flash McPherson Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,
    sorry I use Your name in vain so often when I hurt myself,  Often in conjunction with the verb "damn" or "fuck".  -_-

    ~ Auren
    Posted 2 years ago by ♪♥~ Auren ~♥♪ Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear God,

    Please help me to be funny and insightful in my forum postings.

    Also, could I bum a cool mill? Thanks again!

    -MsKelseyClaire
    Posted 2 years ago by MsKelseyClaire Subscriber! | Permalink
  • *snickers at Auren* Why damn or fuck? How about damn AND fuck? Goddamnfuck!

    Dear GOD,

    I am sorry I curse too much.

    ...

    Actually, no I'm not. Help me think of more words, #%^*¥$.

    -$&@*^#% SeerQueen
    Posted 2 years ago by SeerQueen Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear God,

    Please don't give Clayr the ability to smite people. 
    ME on the other hand....

    Let's do this.

    <3,
    AJ
    Posted 2 years ago by Joan Holloway Subscriber! | Permalink
  • hahaha Queen.  :3
    Posted 2 years ago by ♪♥~ Auren ~♥♪ Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,

    I am clearly a more faithful servant than Anya since I capitalised your name properly. She is unworthy of smiting power.

    *some chanting*

    Thank you,
    Clayr

    P.S. Bless the people who make me laugh with many currants and good FPS rates
    Posted 2 years ago by Clayr Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,

    Please give me the strength of teeth to bite Clayr, despite him being thousands of miles away.
    It's all I want for Christmas this year.
    Or a baby brother.

    I... don't know how this works.
    Obviously.

    In conclusion,
    AJ
    Posted 2 years ago by Joan Holloway Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear God,

    Why do bad Rube trades happen to good Glitches?

    Hey, can you give the Rube the ability to smite people? We already know his judgement is extremely poor - it would be a laugh and a half!

    Kia
    Posted 2 years ago by Kiavora Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear God,

    I learned a lot about friendship today.

    TS
    Posted 2 years ago by Cirnots Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,
    I would most certainly upgrade my subscription to the highest amount if you give the Rube the ability to randomly smite people who decline his trades.

    Faithfully yours,
    Auren
    Posted 2 years ago by ♪♥~ Auren ~♥♪ Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear God,
    Gary Busey and Ted Nugent were fighting about potatoes again today. I splanked them both and Gary got a splinter. I asked him if he was ok and he said "We're doing GREAT!" He's weird, but sort of awesome. 
    ♥ Kittn
    P.S. Have you seen the toof fairy? That broad owes me credits.
    Posted 2 years ago by Kittn Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,

    Bacon.
    Thanks, Kronos Rats.
    Posted 2 years ago by OMG BACON!! Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear Trisor

    Please give me the suave sophistication and silver tongue to make a buck off of all these people and corrupt their children. Enclosed find two silver quoins and a bloody sacrifice to your blasphemous name.

    By the way, love what you've done with the place

    ~MrVolare
    Posted 2 years ago by MrVolare Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear Dog,

    Thank you for being so happy to see me at the end of the day. Sometimes you are the only one to give me a kiss. I love you and will give you a cookie tonight.

    Skanht,

    Forcythia
    Posted 2 years ago by Forcythia Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Deciding what to say to GOD is not
    Easy. Others are asking for favors
    And are insulting their fellow Glitchen.
    Really, I don't know what to decide.

    Grateful I am for this game that I play
    Over and over again. I have too much
    Desire to continue, so thank you.
    Posted 2 years ago by Ygasuasu Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD

    Protect me from Anya's teeth. Also, please give me a flamethrower so I can burn all the butterflies.

    Clayr
    Posted 2 years ago by Clayr Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD, 

    Please give Clay a flame thrower, he really does need it.

    Auren
    Posted 2 years ago by ♪♥~ Auren ~♥♪ Subscriber! | Permalink
  • *quaffs an essence of purple*

    Dear GOD,

    Purple. Why is purple. Purple?

    Puurrrrrrrrrppllleeeeǝǝǝǝןןdddɹɹɹɹnd

    ıuɐʞɐɹp~

    PS: When I woke up, my second floor looked like this: http://www.glitch.com/snaps/PA9GNCMOVKD240I/11622-2589e0b7c9/
    Posted 2 years ago by Drakani Subscriber! | Permalink
  • If you would be so kind as to guide my way to my long lost gnome with say...   A shining beacon I would name my next 100 chickens after you.
    Posted 2 years ago by Zooo Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,
    please don't watch me tonight after I go to bed.  >_>

    Kthxbai.

    ~Auren
    Posted 2 years ago by ♪♥~ Auren ~♥♪ Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear God,
    Preserve us from fools, especially when we're foolish ourselves.

    And please don't give the Rube power to smite people, no matter how funny it'd be, I'm sure I'd be first to go...
    Posted 2 years ago by MoM4.6 Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,

    Please give us a street called Yuo Ohms Tunite so I can go die in it

    Thank you,
    Clayr
    Posted 2 years ago by Clayr Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Just turn off the sound...
    Posted 2 years ago by EarthtoGrace Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Cover your butt, Clayr is watching.

    -God
    Posted 2 years ago by Katechol Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Dear GOD,

    I need more spirits to heal. Please send me some from Hell. I'm sure the shouting guy from there won't mind, especially since I tried to help him and he yelled at me. He's mean.

    Also, if it's too much to ask, I'd like a pair of guard raptors for my house and a kirin to ride around Ur.

    Thanks!

    - KS
    Posted 2 years ago by Kouki Sangoma Subscriber! | Permalink