Topic
"Yo momma so slow, she races in toothpicks instead of planks!" Cubimal Insults Needed!
Hey Glitches! You guys and beauties may not know this. But my favourite past time, when I'm not working of course, is to think up new and exciting ways that cubimals would insult each other if they could talk. Things like "You're barely even square!" and "Yeah? well your springs are rusted!". You might think this is a weird hobby, but hey! I don't judge all your weird hobbies! So finger waving aside I need your help. I've been running out of good insults and I'm getting sooooo bored! Since of course, this is the only way I spend the small amount of spare time I have. Please help me out and suggest some fun insults that cubimals might say to each other.
I only have two criteria for this past time.
1) Has to be a one liner
2) Has to insult a cubimal
Have fun and don't let me down :)
- rayn
Replies
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Series 1 is so Year 8, no one buys you anymore.
The giants must have lowered the standards in the cubimal factory for you.
A pinch of salt is more collectible than you. -
These are mine so far
You have a record going, ON THE SLOWEST CUBIMAL EVER!
you would lose to a sloth
your gear is rusted. - If my 95 year old granny was sauced on gin and tonics, with girders strapped to her orthopedic shoes and metal ore stuffed to the brim of her gigantic embroidered purse, she would still out-race you by 4 planks.
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your cubi is so slow it travels negative planks
seriously though how does that happen? -
You're so slow, bogwater moves faster than you!
You're so slow, Creamy Catsup flows out of the bottle faster than you! -
Are you winding up or winding down?
You should have stayed at Cosmaland!
I know clocks which run faster than you.
Did you give up speed for Zilloween? - Your mama's so square her milk comes out in cartons.
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You're so slow your name means sloth in 3 languages.
You're so slow you make snails feel respected. -
You so slow, ketchup got bored waiting for you to get going.
All wound up and nowhere to go, eh? -
Trying to set a record for slowest cubimal?
You may have heard of the Tortoise and the Hare, but at that speed, you're better off not racing at all! -
Look who's rusted now!
What happened to you? Did you step in a bog? - Yo' momma so fat, she's a ball.
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"You're lagging further behind than wallpaper in decorate mode!"
"If you were any slower you'd be honey in A Wintry Place!" - Speed up - racing is not a leisure activity!
- Hoo-yah ... who's the cube ? who's the cube ? .... thas right
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A small shiny object is worth more than you
You are proof that Imagination CAN go in reverse.
Even deimaginators shudder when they see you
Ooh look a cosmaland reject -
"Are you one of them defective Cubimals I heard about?"
"Your Cubie must be Helga & Uncle Friendly's Love Child!"
"Funpickle, your mother was a blender and your father was a Squid."
"What goes 'plonk-thud-plonk-thud-plonk'? Cubies, rolling down a hill!"
eta: *Love rayn's "You're so 2 dimensional"!
♥ - A cubimal nearly walked into a bar
- Scarlet Bearsdale's wall paper one made me lol.
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My Rude Cubimal Insult Entries:
1. What are you doing here? Aren't you a square?
2. I can handle your rotten smell but your unglitchiness is a trifle uncalled for.
3. You primitive tank of hazardous sloth waste.
+1 to derek smalls www.glitch.com/forum/ideas/...
Series 1 is so Year 8, no one buys you anymore.
The giants must have lowered the standards in the cubimal factory for you.
A pinch of salt is more collectible than you. -
So, I guess you are celebrating International Sloth Day.
You must have taken the scenic route. -
Did you need to meditate a bit, or are you planning to keep running races while Pooped?
You're so slow GOD's going to have to restart your game any minute now. - Are you sure you're OK, you seem a little Rooked.
- "You're so slow, GOD told me I'd been playing too long"
- Hey, wouldn't it be cool if these were implemented??
- Any slower and you'd have gone to the left.
- Your mother was a smuggler and your father smelt of whortleberries. I shard in your general direction.
- +1 Rennie
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"I hope all your cogs fall out, except for one, and that that one is rusty!"
"Cog-less, plank runner!"
"Keep Glitch tidy, release a Cubie a day."
"You're one cog shy of a running set!"
♥ -
Call yourself a cube? I've seen better looking pyramids.
Six faces and each of 'em uglier than a squeezed chicken's backside.
You're a six-faced no-good liar.
Your vertices are riddled with syntax errors.
You're more a Rube's cube than a Rubik's.
Your bits don't even obey Euler's relationship, in fact you're barely Platonic.
Get your cogs off one of Lance Armstrong's old bikes, did you?
How you gonna race with no Start button? What are you, a Cube8 cube?
47% of binders have bayonets faster than you!
Your functions don't recurse, your stack overflows, your sides won't resolve and your edges don't even parse properly. -
1. I thought cubimals couldn't smell bad, but then I met you.
2. Seeing you running reminds me a plane with opened windows.
3. Your father's so dumb he's training to be a crash test cubimal.
4. Hey buddy those are nice wheels, what brand are they? Junkyard? - Yo momma so fat, when she sits around the cubimal case, she sits AROUND the cubimal case.
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I posted these on twitter as well -
"You're so common that your glitch didn't even get you all the way out of the box before she was releasing you for the iMG bonus!"
and the comeback - "Oh, that's rich, coming from a semi-rare!" -
1. Insult "Talk about rook attacks on many streets! You can't even make it across one street!"
Comeback "Say that one more time and I will attack your street!"
2. Insult "Yo mama so strange she catches on fire when she tries to run away from you!"
Comeback "I don't have a mom. I'm a cubimal for pete's sake!" -
Run for the hills, if you can catch them!
You look better when you're in the box!
The box you came is is rarer than you!
I thought factory defects weren't allowed to race!
You lose races before you even start them!
You're a Loseimal!
Go back to where you belong, in the dumpster! -
Yo momma so slow 'cause her wheels don't all turn in the same direction.
I heard your owner tried to trade you for a bean!
You're not the brightest square in the cubimal case. -
More like series ZERO
You so ugly, yo momma discontinued you!
Back in the box!
How can you be so cranky and go so slow?
I'd trade YOU for some grain (alternatively)
I wouldn't trade my grain for YOU.
You so dumb, you walk negative planks! -
Your father was an SWF!
I'll bet the Vendor sells you with a "no returns" policy!
You seem pretty gifted - er, "re-gifted", rather! -
You're the reason they won't make series 3 cubimals!
You are slower than a glitchen running around in Hell!
You are too slow to be insulted! -
oooh so this is where the insults were created. so funny! I went to cebarkul and battled for the first time and had a good laugh for what the cubis are saying . love it!
i got one too..."Hey! You went afk!" - You're so useless the rube wouldn't even trade you for one red element! (or insert other basically valueless item)
- That's just enough planks to make a coffin for your career!
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Your Momma's so fat she didn't make it to Cosmaland when she was released.
OR
Your Momma's so fat that she fell back to Ur from Cosmaland - If you were going any slower, you'd be going in reverse!