Topic

What was your grandmother's best advice?

When I was prepubescent, my grandmother said to me,  "Don't be a kissing post."         This meant that a lady does not kiss just anyone....Play hard to get.. this advice holds true  to  today..   Make mystery in your love life...

Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink

Replies

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  • My grandmother never gave me advise - but she made me apple pies, just for me!

    What more could a grandson desire?
    Posted 8 years ago by MeherMan Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Hah!  The only advice I can remember from my grandmother was,  "Jimmy, stop playing with yourself!"  I was only 4 or 5 at the time and had no idea what she meant, but the admonition always stuck with me.  I was fully clothed at the time, but I imagine my hand must have strayed to a location she did not approve of!  ;-)
    Posted 8 years ago by Hawkwell Subscriber! | Permalink
  • LMAO @Hawkwell!
    Posted 8 years ago by ?joby? Subscriber! | Permalink
  • "When posting to Internet forums, stay on topic."
    Posted 8 years ago by glum pudding Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I was very young when both of my grandmothers died so I have very few memories and do not recall any advise.  I can imagine though that my Mother's mother may have said, "You will find it advantageous to stay out of my flower garden."  I recall her being fussy about it.  This was in Texas hill country.  I can recall her getting my Grandfather to shoot some armadillos that had made the mistake of getting in her garden.
    Posted 8 years ago by Brib Annie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • "Past the age of 65, effing with other people's minds is more fun than at any other time of your life."
    Posted 8 years ago by Nanookie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • "Any man who loves cats is a good man."
    Posted 8 years ago by theodorenott Subscriber! | Permalink
  • My Greandmother always said the best advise was: Were you there? Did You see it and did you hear it with your own ears, if not then be careful of what you say about what you did not see or hear if you were not there. Sage advise from a fantastic Grand Lady. I miss her but I know with her sense of adventure she is playing Glitch in the hear after :)))
    Posted 8 years ago by celticlady Subscriber! | Permalink
  • my grandmother said "don't crack your knuckles or you'll get knuckles like mine" which scared the living hell out of me (i was probably 5 at the time). i can honestly say i've only cracked my knuckles accidentally since then. 
    Posted 8 years ago by emdot Subscriber! | Permalink
  • She also showed me a box she saved of string too short to use...  She was extremely thrifty.  She advised that I should never    spray   perfume   on my neck  or behind my ears  when I was dressed in good clothes...   Do it while you are nekkid....
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • My grandmother taught me "If you have nothing good to say about someone/something then say nothing". 
    It's brilliant and I have used it on a few occasions where I was asked my opinion and didn't agree,  "My grandmother always said if I had nothing good to say, say nothing" so I choose to say "nothing".

    She also taught me that horses sweat, gentlemen perspire and ladies glow :)
    Posted 8 years ago by Teena Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @glumPudding "When posting to Internet forums, stay on topic." - damn your gradmother was way, way ahead of her time!  :)
    Posted 8 years ago by MeherMan Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Amen,   MeherMan, I was thinking the exact same thing!           Dang, that woman must have been freakin' amazin.'
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • "You have to have the eyes of a potato" applicable anywhere near traffic.
    Posted 8 years ago by Ani Laurel Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Learn to cook. Simple advice, works well IRL and in Glitch.
    Posted 8 years ago by TK-855 Subscriber! | Permalink
  • My dear grandmother gave me lots of advices. The one that stuck with me is this:
    Dont have such a rush to experience everything at once, take your time! I hope the translation from swedish to english is to understand. She was 97 when she left us.
    Posted 8 years ago by mrsheart2 Subscriber! | Permalink
  • My grandma advises me frequently, as well as Facebook messages my friends, that if we ever take God's name in vain we will end up in hell.

    I am proudly the first apple to fall off the crazy Catholic tree.  Not that all Catholics or religious folk are crazy, just the ones in my family.
    Posted 8 years ago by Laurali Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Best advice grandmother ever gave me: "Keep it down in there."
    Posted 8 years ago by malo Subscriber! | Permalink
  • malo--is that at all related to Hawkwell's advice to "stop playing with yourself!"  ?
    Posted 8 years ago by Nanookie Subscriber! | Permalink
  • No Nanookie, the way I took it wasn't as a solo act. More like a duet. Probably miles away from her actual intent.
    Posted 8 years ago by malo Subscriber! | Permalink
  • If the dog bites you...For Heaven's sake!! Don't bite her back!!!
    (They always told me to bite my brothers back...so why was the dog so privileged?!)  :P
    Posted 8 years ago by sgjo Subscriber! | Permalink
  • In regards  to  not playing with yourself,  my uncle said  he was told by  his grandfather,  "Keep your hands in your pockets and your peter in your pants.  "
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • The best advice my grandmother (or anyone else for that matter) has ever given me: "Don't cook bacon while naked." 

    Taken literally, its fantastic advice all on its own. If you look a little deeper it means think about what you're doing and the consequences and try to be prepared. At least that's what I get from it when I try to be deep.
    Posted 8 years ago by Kippsi Subscriber! | Permalink
  • In england its sometimes referred to as 'pocket billiards'
    Posted 8 years ago by Niggle Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @Niggle , dearest.!...  I googled "pocket billiards" and right you are! Game on tomorrow. Let's do lunch at Grodle Meadow! I'll bring the drinks.
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • To enjoy skinny-dipping. Gramie was Norwegian and very casual about nudity. She would have loved Rascalmom.
    Posted 8 years ago by jasbo Subscriber! | Permalink
  • "always pay with the face of the money turned to you - and think: it goes, but itīll get back!"

    I swear that I can't pay anything without the face of money looking at me!
    Posted 8 years ago by acreditando Subscriber! | Permalink
  • lmao jasbo Just a reminder here: RM is not really RL nudist ;) It all hangs out in Glitch!
    Posted 8 years ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • And I'm not much of an in-game nudist. I like the clothes too much...
    Posted 8 years ago by jasbo Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @napa lunch sounds lovely, i'll bring the pimms and will try my utmost not to play pocket billiards! :O

    on topic, one of my mothers favourite sayings is 'if you look after the pennies the pounds will look after themselves'
    Posted 8 years ago by Niggle Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Just to share; my paternal Grandmother taught me to pray. She prayed on her knee's three times a day, everyday! With no exaggeration, when she passed on, she had a smile on her face, like it was wonderful!

    My maternal Grandmother taught me to cook and wore beautiful aprons! She too was prayerful and helped other's alway's.
    They didn't have a saying, they taught me by example!     Did I follow their lead? Yup!
    Posted 8 years ago by Joy Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I have it on good authority  that RM parades around nude in front of Hank all the time.
    This is with the bedroom door locked of course and the curtains drawn.. How else can you explain that they have been happily married 15 years..?
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • My grandmother's best advice wasn't to me, but to my mother: stop being so damn ignorant and accept gay people for who they are.

    Sure came in handy for me, lol.
    Posted 8 years ago by Cerulean Subscriber! | Permalink
  • My grandmother ,the fine lady she was ,came to me in a realistist dream and said to me"Don`t forget to say the grace" my child was told this also and we say it every day .
    Posted 8 years ago by Jellybelly Baby Subscriber! | Permalink
  • These are unbelievably beautiful remembrances of our grams.. I knew from Granny I had uncondtional love.   She said, " Beth, even if you  (GOD forbid) murdered someone I would still love  you."
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @emdot: I think we have the same grandmother!

    When she was 95 my grandmother told me, "It's the strangest thing. No matter how old I get, I still feel like I'm 18 on the inside". That gives me hope.
    Posted 8 years ago by Widdershins Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I am going to print this out..... remarkable...someone should make a book ...
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I found a pencil at my grandparents house to draw with, and noticed the eraser was missing. When I asked what I should do I was told " Just don't make a mistake"...
    And my boss wonders why I'm a perfectionist..
    Posted 8 years ago by Muncey Mango Subscriber! | Permalink
  • *pulls curtains shut...peeks outside for the secret cameras...checks room for bugs...* 
    Posted 8 years ago by RM Subscriber! | Permalink
  • No gram, but mother said "never do anything that you would be embarrassed by if I walked in the room" of course I did but it was and still is in the back of my mind all these years later.
    Posted 8 years ago by Naiad Subscriber! | Permalink
  • I  have  a  cowboy friend.    He said when he was growing up  they were so poor his dad cut holes in his pockets so he would have something to play with.
    Posted 8 years ago by napabeth Subscriber! | Permalink
  • Drink beer every day like she did. She lived into her 90's.
    By the way, she never actually said I should do it. I just--like Joy--copy her example.
    Posted 8 years ago by Crucial Subscriber! | Permalink
  • "you get used to hanging if you hang long enough."

    we weren't allowed to complain about being bored, because you could always... "go bang your head against a wall." 

    yes, my grandmother was a wonder.
    Posted 8 years ago by greenkozi Subscriber! | Permalink
  • My great grandmother taught me that food is the great common bond that brings people of disparate opinions, life stages and goals to the table. If you cook with love, and share what you have cooked with those you have invited, you can come to agreements that you might not have otherwise.  

    My grandmother taught me that loyalty should be fierce, love should be unconditional, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself, we teach people how to treat us and that your yes is only as good as your no.

    As a result of these pieces of wisdom, I feed my project teams and business partners, make sure I mean what I say and say what I mean and that I treat others according to how I wish to be treated.
    Posted 8 years ago by g33kgurrl Subscriber! | Permalink
  • g33, I wanna work on your project teams!  Wait... ::eyes bathroom scale:: hmmm... maybe not.
    Posted 8 years ago by jasbo Subscriber! | Permalink
  • jasbo -- I'll be porting some food pr0n pics to G+ later. Be sure you check out the albums. :D
    Posted 8 years ago by g33kgurrl Subscriber! | Permalink
  • LOVE this thread!
    When telling my grandma about my (ex)husband being so worried about the shade being up in the bedroom (upstairs), afraid someone would see in.. she said "If they've never seen it before they won't know what it is; if they've seen it before it's nothing new."... my grandma is NOT a foot loose, fancy-free kinda lady so this was a delight! I think about it often when i'm worried someone might be able to see in the house :)
    Posted 8 years ago by Niknik Subscriber! | Permalink
  • no matter what you do, do it like a lady
    Posted 8 years ago by coolbettycakes Subscriber! | Permalink
  • @ greenkozi - I didn't dare to say in my grandmothers hearing that I was bored, she could always find something for me to do. And expected it to be done!
    Posted 8 years ago by Teena Subscriber! | Permalink
  • "You don't have to tell everything you know."

    She also taught me to knit.
    Posted 8 years ago by Ida Keen Subscriber! | Permalink
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