Hello! I found this broken watering can on your street. So I fixed it up for you! I don't know whether it's yours or not, but you can have it :)
Cheers!

I have entrusted this document to my faithful and beloved butler, VAN VEEN, to copy and distribute as he sees fit. First, the matter of my pigs, the BLACKWOOD family. I have been negligent in their care and so remand them to the wild; Ur is a kind and caring place. Secondly, to PLAID, my dearest friend. You have remained steadfast, even in our argument over the final article of the Abstrixian Creed of the Thirty-Thirteenth Alakol Convene of the Oktyabryan Synod, up to and including my excommunication. I hereby trust you with my chest of NO-NO POWDER. Third, the matter of my FAITH. To the public eye I have been a devoted HUMBABAN. I have donated my belongings to her shrine, and until the conclusion of this line she commands my greatest adoration. I am coming clean as a member of the Rookist cult. You will find my tax returns, records of seditious activities and several bottles of wine in the hidden drawer at the back of my Danish Modern cabinet.