Topic
On the road with the Sloth Knockers
Day three of our tour of Ur and beyond. Strung out on no-no and face smelters. Sick of sleeping in the basements of abandoned apartment blocks.
The %^&@$! drummer died one too many times and is stuck in hell, pooped and afk. We need a new drummer. And the fluegelhorn section was last seen jumping around in Lexdistim Guitur suspected to have fallen into a pit under a hollow tree. Contact me or Cleops to audition to be in the band.
Wrote two new song today, "Meatjoy" and "Knockin' Sloths". The scream of the fail whale at the end of Knockin' Sloths will be EXCELLENT. I'm still thinking about the lines "Naraka's torment, hell pig quibble/ Glitchens screaming as they nibble". Yeah, I was on no-no when I wrote it, but is "quibble" badass enough for Gllltch metal? Thinking.
We also need roadies and groupies. Bring hooch!!!
Replies
- Dude!
- Man, I love "Meatjoy." \m/
- i'll play trombone.
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Awesomesauce! To all the budding lyricists and music fans the Sloth Knockers plan to write lyrics to all the music blocks and have band members play them simulataneously at various live venues across UR while our lead singer shouts the lyrics.
Please drop a line below if:
You have any Glitchy lyrics to any of the MB's.
Just want to play in the band
Want to be a roadie to help distribute MB's and hooch
or wanna be a groupie -
Oh I SOOOO wanna be a groupie! Check out my awesome swoon....*swooooooooons*
I'll even help out on occasion as a roadie, so long as it doesn't involve too much work...between piggy rescuing and daily maintenance tasks and cheerleading the peat resource streets, I'm a bit allergic to any more Glitch-related "work," but I do have plenty of hooch and purple to pass out to folks, if they're not already passed out. ;)
Would love to take part in a few performances, if you need singers and/or tambourine shakers...I'll try my hand at some lyrics after I've had my coffee. Are you guys strictly metal, or do you incorporate other styles like folk or Celtic rock for some of the more "mellow" blocks? I can only take so much screaming before my head explodes...not exactly an attractive look. ;) - This. Wicked. Swag in wardrobe (if not IRL)? Necessary.
- +1 Voluptua...plenty of cool threads in the wardrobe to choose from. Also, the new vanity features will def add to the stage look...face painting and piercings, not to mention the bleary red eyes from too much partying. ;)
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lml o.o lml
You rock. If I spot the knockers I'll be coming rocking. - Can I accompany flask, on the kazoo?
- This is awesome! Put my street on your poster placement list. :)
- Too effing awesome! :D
- Sloth Knockers t-shirt. That's all I'm sayin'. We need this.
- I'm a groupie through and through... I'll follow them anywhere!
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oh. my. giants. the Ur-famous Sloth Knockers are in town? And having auditions?
swedrfgtyhujikopl];[sbextrying out for drums.cant wait. - All night cubi race and drug orgy was maybe a bad idea. God we trashed that apartment block. Cleops kept going "Hey! Hey lizzard! " like a %^&&*!! crab and then screaming "I can flyyyyyyyy" and jumping till she banged her head on the ceiling. Then onward to The Missing Floor where we had an audition or two and broke all our kitchen tools. I have never seen people do such *disgusting* things with Uncle Friendly cubis. Dang!!!!!
- KitchWitch, we need a bunch of music blocks, definitely some BB-1 and DG-5, and more to be determined.... you could leave them with Bazooka, my <del>butler</del> robot groupie.
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right. so i answered the ad from the classifieds and i was pretty sure i was applying for the 2d chair percussion position with the fenneq regional symphony which is just one step above the outer balzare municipal band, but i recently took a bath when the plank market tanked and i needed a job.
so i put on my pinstripe suit and everything and show up with my briefcase of mallets and my repertoire of orchestral excerpts but i got there and it's a dumpy hotel suite out by eastern approach and the place stinks of stale pumpkin ale and this purple hair person is passed out in the corner.
"excuse me? i'm here for the percussion position?", i say, and all i hear is some broken laughter or maybe racking sobs coming from under the bed and purple hair waves a hand peremptorily in my direction and mutters
"we already have a drummer."
and i do a doble take, because this is not the fenneq regional symphony; these are the SLOTH KNOCKERS. the fucking sloth knockers.
and i'm all, like, "what?!?! no honkin' WAY!" and they laugh and someone says they like my look and asks if i do anything amusing.
"AMUSING???? how's this for amusing?" and i play the xylophone part for the william tell overture on every glass surface i can find and for good measure i throw the TV out the window.
"if i'd KNOWN," i say with some venom, that i was applying for a freakin' variety show, i'd have brought my soft shoes and my trombone."
"you play trombone?" purple hair asks.
"yeah, and also uilleann pipes and kazoo."
"cool. we need a trombone player."
so we all downed some wine of the dead to seal the deal and went tomato shopping with trisor.
hey, is that a sammich? 'coz i'm a little toasty for something...
*wanders off, working out a nono crash* -
*yawn*
*scratches butt*
Just recovered from the last time I was stampeded on by the slans. Wazzup Sloth Knocker dudes?
Yeah if you go on tour I'll be charging hazard pay for running security. You guys have the weirdest slans. I mean, who goes to concerts with Metal Rods instead of lighters or glo-sticks?
Oh! and I think some of your boys left some musicblocks mixed in along with my riot gear. -
Knockin' on the shrine
with rods of iron
Get outta my way, you.
We gonna kick em in the lems
with our steel-cap boots
Makem swine when they was divine
Get on our side
If you wanna see the new day
If you don't wanna feel our wrath
Cause we are a comin
And we ain't gonna tithe
We is sloths and we gonna rock -
Rook booger
Rook booger
Who ya scared of, birdy boy?
I saw yer look when I pushed you down,
When I laughed at yer little scratchy claws
And yer skinny legs and feet.
Yeah, bring yer birdy buddies, too
I got friends they'd like to meet.
Rook booger
Rook booger
Yeah, you think you're so tough and wise
Them tiny, little Glitchen defeat you every time
They are hip to yer stupid lies
You better bring all yer birdy buddies
To my street if they dare to fight
We ain't scared of you
we don't know fear
We is sloths and we love to rock -
I will sing my 2 hit singles to the tune of BB-1 and DG-5 but with more fuzz and feedback then in a sort of eddie wintour move like in Frankenstein throw my keyboard on the floor and turn all the knobs up to 11 .
Cleops - triangle
lizzard - bass, keyboards, screaming
Mal'akh - roadie, bouncer
Osprey - lyrics (and performance?)
flask - trombone, kazoo, uilleann pipes
Jennyanydots - kazoo accompaniment (must post description of audition or 4am interaction with band)
cuterthancaffeine - audition coming up soon!
KlitchWitch - help with the flyering before the show!
Meatjoy (BB-1)
Twisted joy of giant's meat
The bacon burns so dark and sweet
Naraka's torment, hell pig quibble
Glitchens screaming as they nibble!
MEATJOY!!!!!!!
Knockin' Sloths (DG-5)
Freakin' wake up, sloth in a tree
Chew my metal, spit a snail
Or face the wrath of Hell's fail whale -
"Hello Sloth Knockers c:
I will be auditioning today. I hope I get in the band because I have been following you guys ever since i first stepped out of plexus. I will be playing double bass, but I guess I could play any string instrument you give me Harp, lute, banjo, uke, viola, mandolin, guitar... you name it. I'm also pretty good with drums, but I guess you guys have that covered. i should probably get started... What? you don't like mandolin? well, I guess you're right, it does kinda remind me of Uncle Friendly after he takes a jog. Anyhow..."
*plays the double bass and shatters all windows*
" Oh my giants. I am so sorry. Are you all okay? Do you want a band aid-What do you mean 'how did I learn to play like that'? Well, I sing to butterflys a lot. And I meditate. I don't know. Well, thanks for letting me audition. And not trashing up the place. Lemme know when you find a new band member, 'kay? Thanks guise" -
You can definitely poster my street for your next tour. Hit me up for rock pole position.
And I'll be at your shows with musicblocks & hooch & fangirl madness, just not ... you know ... reliably. I cannot commitments because rock & roll. - can i be a roadie?
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Thanks for all those who have "auditioned" and all those who have offered roadie/groupie/free PR above. Anyone know glitch KANYE? We should invite him for a guest spot to some of our gigs.
Please keep the volunteering and fantastic suggestions coming of music blocks and lyrics to use and the band will start putting a set list together.
If this glitch is a rockin' be sure they're sloth knockin' - awesome songs!
- lem.to/p/AU0q
- @lizzard you got it luv...working on it! Unfortunately, music blocks are one thing I DON'T hoard, so I'm working on a stash. Also working on stashing metal chunks for concert decor. ;)
- @lizzard: I have some hoarded music blocks you guys could use c:.
- Please leave music blocks with my butler or with Cleops'! I think we will also be throwing things at the audience and decorating the stage with lots of metal!
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Thanks so much Mal'akh for all the music blocks you left with my butler:) We will make sure to thank and reward everyone who has contributed to our fame when the first Sloth Knockers album goes Molybdenum.
New songs include Hangin' with my loamies, Rubes theme and Horbleblorp (Hurry up it's time)
SLOTH KNOCKERS! - Sounds like a Stephen King novel :)
- Bog Central Station is ready & waiting for tour posters.
- OMGiants! Best. Thread. Ever!
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*scratches butt*
I suppose you want me to hang a Sloth Knockers poster too, huh? Just leave it with Wadsworth, 'kay? -
To all Sloth Knockers - In the next couple of days I will be posting some of the band's lyrics on note poles in my street for you to read while listening to the melody on my music block trophies underneath as part of this project: http://www.glitch.com/forum/general/23701/#reply-249642.
Any other band members who want to do that and sign up for the route let me know and I will furnish you with note poles and lyrics, etc.
I will post here when it is up and running. - FYI - visit my home street if you want to here some songs and lyrics by the Sloth Knockers band
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Whasssup Sloth Knockers?!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I saw the new hair and thought SLOTH KNOCKERS *air guitar*
Where's the next show? If it's a big stage you need with space for fans, I've got one.
Are you lyrics still posted on your streets? or have you moved into towers now? - OH! sorry.. i thought this was the thread for sloth porn... *walks back out with bottle of wine*