Status update
FyodorD

All of the recent honesty and disclosure has inspired me to do the same. I sincerely hope that none of my close friends are too disappointed and that I don't burn any bridges by doing this but I have faith that all of you will be understanding. So....... the truth... I am really 18 months old. Some of you may have suspected already and many others are horribly shocked I am sure. For the record, I rarely poo myself anymore these days and I have almost completely stopped using it as a wall crayon. Admittedly I whine a lot, suck people's thumbs (mine is disgusting) and do the baby slide if you try to pick me up, but I will not apologize for my all natural milk supply. Don't you dare take that away from me. I may still be a little wobbly when I walk and have a funny shaped head, but I am people too dammit. That is all. I hope we can still be friends.

13 replies


13 replies
  1. Osiris ?

    I'm mildly disturbed that you are 1.5, dad. Logic and reason = out the window

    1 reply


  2. Leļla

    lol! I have to admit that i'm not surprised, i've always suspected you were underage, especially since i saw that picture: www.glitch.com/snaps/PUVSR0...


  3. chilirlw

    You'd think I'd be uncomfortable discussing porn and cheetos in front of an 18 month old, but, strangely, I'm not. *munch*

    1 reply


  4. kastlin

    Somehow I always pictured you as older, like 24-30 months. But as long as I'm not planning on dating you, I'll just be impressed by your maturity.


  5. scroobienoob

    well. i'm a *little* disturbed by this news... i mean... being that we... had something...waking up with you under the dinosaur's ass-crack-of-dawn that day, frolicking in poo and mimicking each other; i guess that's normal behavior for a toddler i now realize........... i also realize that it was more of a bowel movement, not a ....bowel moment. i just don't know if i can face anyone right now. i may need therapy. what kind of monster am i??? i think what i've done is illegal? oh dear. i'm confused. i feel cheated. and a little dirty. all this time i ignored the warning signs: the oedipal complex, claims that you fathered illegitimate children... i was in denial of the truth. the truth that you violated the terms of service!!! you're nothing but a cheater! and a liar! and a poo- flinger! *sobs* I don't know, fyo. i just don't know. i need some time to adjust to this matter of epic, startling fecundity. <clutches chest>

    1 reply


  6. Voluptua Sneezelips

    I thought you were a little short and funny-looking, but I let it go because you had such a beautiful, luxuriant beard.

    1 reply


  7. Kukubee

    Wow, now I feel awkward for having shown you my dong and selling you drugs!


  8. Ayasta

    Damnit! You have me beat! I was going to come out that I'm really 3... I'm totally telling people NO all the time and throwing tantrums left and right when I don't get my way.


  9. bored no more

    so wait.... if you're actually 1 1/2 .... and you are 3 years older than me..... no wonder I felt so young

    1 reply


  10. Snazzlefrazz

    I remember you from the Alpha when you were still an embryo


in reply to

Status update
chilirlw

You'd think I'd be uncomfortable discussing porn and cheetos in front of an 18 month old, but, strangely, I'm not. *munch*


1 reply

Status update
Axa

The visuals running with happy, wild abandon through my head-- all those little randy Cheetos soon' it (a thing is a phallic symbol if it's longer than it's wide. . . As the I'd goes marching on).

1 reply


1 reply